Author: City

People who wear white tees are as uncreative as their shirts.

Time waits for no one. Except Roger Federer.

I feel like crossfitters are people who gave up because they just can’t put on mass.

Picky eaters make terrible lovers.  The mouth is a tool for pleasure.

I find that people who have designated spots on couches tend to be feeble in will power and have terrible first placements in Catan.

Whale prints are for slow eaters and poor tactical minds.

You can only hit so many forehand winners when running on Cheez-Its.

I feel like none of my friends care about the feminist movement as much as I do.

If you’re under him, you ain’t getting over him.

One day your mother put you down and never picked you up again.