We started with 20 winners of the hit reality show, pitting some of the game’s all time best players against each other. Let’s start from Day 1 and recap the entire season in completely unnecessary detail that wastes everyone’s time.
KIDDING! Because of course I wouldn’t do that. I think it’s safe to assume if you’re reading this that you know what’s been happening this season. And there is no reason to go through a season recap at a time that makes no sense. And sure, you could argue that me writing this is also wasting your time, as it’s not providing anything of substance. But let’s not go there.
Let’s focus on how Survivor wasted the last 20 minutes of this week’s episode. Ideally, they would have shown us the final Edge of Extinction challenge. If not that, we could have seen more strategy talk, or more awesome moments at camp, like the hilarious conversation between Tony and Jeremy arguing about how many days are in a week.
Or really, literally anything other than what they showed instead. This is usually the part that we see to start the finale, so there is absolutely no reason Survivor shouldn’t start next week with the Edge challenge. But once again, an incredible waste of time, a complete letdown after an otherwise (mostly) exciting preceding 100 minutes of Survivor.
Koru
Tony and Sarah are running this game like it’s nobody’s business. Tony has had recent stretches of dominance that rival any other run from any other season. And Sarah has been equally effective, though seemingly a little more under the radar, or at least less flashy. And they put it on full display this week, working together on Ben.
Tony and Sarah want to vote out Nick, but Ben still only has eyes for Jeremy. The Cops ‘R Us duo pull an Inception on the former Marine, letting him, as Sarah put it “think he’s driving for once.” Sarah does most of the heavy lifting, talking to Ben about why Nick makes more sense right now than Jeremy. And it works to perfection. The next thing we know, the show cuts to Ben pitching the idea of voting out Nick to Tony. These two are truly something special, and being able to watch them work together has been an absolute joy to watch. They might be the only person that can beat the other in a Final Tribal, and I am pulling for them to be there together at the end with all my might.
Immunity Challenge
The players have two balls that they must toss onto an overhead track and catch on the other side. Then they dig under a bar in the sand, finishing with a slide puzzle. Nick wins.
This was a fun challenge. Seeing Tony and Ben kicking sand was something I didn’t have on my Winners at War Bingo card, but it was obviously a welcome addition. And this isn’t meant to rag on Michele, but it was mostly hilarious watching her constant struggles with the balls. I’m a big fan of Michele, but it’s equal opportunity when it comes to laughing at players’ misfortunes in Survivor challenges.
Tribal Council
The night’s first Tribal Council presented a small but poignant look into what Survivor players’ lives are like after returning from the game. As fans, we watch a season, it ends, that’s it. For the players, though, the effects of the game may linger much longer. And this didn’t even touch on the physical effects, it was all mental, specifically how you can trust people in your everyday life after being on a game where you second guess nearly every single thing spoken to you for as long as you’re in the game. Ben spoke about having trust issues with his life, Jeremy about not fully trusting his fellow firefighters, Michele about not being able to trust a stranger’s directions to a bar. Wait…one of those things doesn’t quite fit, does it?
But the point remains. This isn’t a part of the game enough fans consider. There is a real toll being on an island and away from your family and friends and regular life that Survivor takes on these people. Props to Jeff Probst and crew for leaving this very real, very human, very vulnerable moment in the final cut.
When it comes time to vote, Michele uses her 50/50 coin, playing it on herself. It lands on “Safe” but it wouldn’t matter as Jeremy received three votes to Ben and Michele’s (invalid) two each, sending him to the Edge.
Edge of Extinction
Cool, Natalie found another advantage. Because of course she did? As Tyson so eloquently put it, “She is becoming part of the island.” This time she gets to sell an advantage to someone still in the game. And that advantage allows the buyer to place a disadvantage on someone else in the next Immunity Challenge.
She decides to sell it to Nick for eight Fire Tokens. He has six and gets the other two from Michele to buy it, using it on Ben.
I don’t want to go on a big, long rant, so suffice it to say that advantages and disadvantages have no place in Immunity Challenges. It’s too important a part of the game to not let it play out on equal footing. And to have it originate from the Edge to boot? F that.
Immunity Challenge
The castaways stack blocks on a beam while avoiding trip obstacles. The blocks are stacked to fall like dominoes, with the final one landing on a gong. With the disadvantage, Ben has 30 percent more beam and 30 percent more blocks to stack. And even with that, he comes up just short, watching Michele win immunity.
Tribal Council
Nick gives himself the Survivor kiss of death, telling us in a confessional how perfectly his plan worked, how he might now be in the best position he’s been in during the game so far.
And that was all the Survivor gods wrote, as Nick is voted out 4-2.
Edge of Extinction
Before Probst’s unnecessary season recap, we get a short scene back at the Edge. The inhabitants receive word on the next day’s challenge, so then begins a montage of players talking about all the advantages they are going to buy.
And with her 847 Fire Tokens, Natalie buys three (THREE!) advantages, a jar of peanut butter, a Sleep Number mattress, full luxury tent, four more immunity idols, and another advantage. Okay, she actually only bought the first three (AGAIN, THREE!) advantages and peanut butter, but she might as well have bought everything else. Oh, and she also bought an EXTRA IMMUNITY idol to give to Tyson. AN EXTRA IMMUNITY IDOL!
I have nothing but respect for what Natalie has gone through on the Edge and for all that she’s been able to accomplish. But let’s not forget that she was the FIRST PERSON VOTED OUT. I like her as a player, and by all accounts she seems like a wonderful person. But if she comes back and *shudders* wins, this will go from a great season to, well I don’t know how far it would drop, but it would drop hard and fast.
I’ll have a finale preview out next week, so be on the lookout for that on either Monday or Tuesday.
And just for good measure, here’s that Jeremy/Tony conversation one more time. Because why not.
